an inconvenient hacking

as i was walking away from dropping my youngest off at school this morning, i had a call from my hubby. (an unusual time for him to call) i answered the phone with a "what's up?". he hesitated and i began to freak. was he in a car accident? are things okay at work? do you still have a job? did he get a call from family and he is sharing difficult news? ??? i was genuinely worried.

(insert continued dramatic pause here)

...then he shared with me that both his yahoo and facebook accounts were hacked. whoever the hacker is did a great job as they tweaked e-mail address and account settings and made it impossible for him to access account information. then shortly after i posted about the hack on my facebook page, calls and e-mails started coming in. the hacker (who i really need to come up with a nickname for...he has been the topic of conversation all morning here and i feel we may be spending more time together than i would like) sent out an e-mail under the hubby's name that we were in london, we were attacked by a man with a pistol and all our money, id's, cell phones, etc. were taken. we went to the embassy and the police, but they were no help. now, we are trapped at the hotel because they will not let us leave until the bill is paid. could you help us out in our plight?

let us set the hacker straight:
1.) we are at home and did not take any last minute european getaway. it is SO not in our budget. i love to travel, but we have school-age children and i would not be taking them out of school this time of year. and if we were going to take this trip, we would have been telling all of our family and friends immediately because i would never be able to contain my excitement about a trip like that.
2.) we would NEVER contact friends via e-mail to ask for money...even in a situation as bizarre as the hacker suggested. does anyone really do that???
3.) the hacker should not have picked my husband's account to pose as because he notoriously never checks facebook, let alone communicates with everyone via that route. do your homework, hacker!
4.) i had plans for this morning and the hacker completely messed that up.
*sarcastically* thank you, hacker.
instead, i got to go through and verify and change passwords on all of our online accounts. probably good to do this more often than we do, but it is not how i was planning my morning today. i do not appreciate what you have spent your energies on, hacker.
5.) for all the time and energy that this takes for all parties involved--the perpetrator and the perpetrated--YOU COULD BE WORKING AT A REAL JOB!!! you could have made some serious money using real computer skills instead of preying on people with back-alley tricks.

one last thing to the hacker:
i pray that no one falls for your schemes. i know we are not the only account that you hacked. i hope that as you attempt this scheme over and over that you make a mistake that leads to the end of this 'career choice' of yours. i do sincerely hope that you are busted.