christmas has come and gone.
in as hurried as it came upon us, it hurried right on past.
paper has been flying off gifts, goodies baked and eaten, lots of travels and visits.
what i've appreciated and loved the most have been some sweet moments with friends and family. we see each other and chat all year long, but there are little special 'extras' that come with the Christmas season. a different kind of thoughtfulness and acts of kindness. everyone is busy and has so many things to do--which makes those extra visits and acts even more special. we matter enough to each other that we make time in the middle of all our busy moments.
so...thank you to all my dear friends and family--visits and gifts and treats and dear words--thank you for being a part of my life. God uses you in so many ways that it would be difficult for me to mention all the ways in one little post. just please know that i am grateful and i pray that God blesses you in ways that only He can.
merry Christmas and a very blessed 2008 to all
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Thursday, December 20, 2007
unnoticed
no fanfare
no red carpet
no media
nothing obvious
it blows my mind to think that God entered this world
in the most unnoticed of ways.
no grandeur
no phenomenal signs or wonders
nothing to set Him apart
God entered the world
through a frail teenage girl.
He came in unexpected ways.
He came unnoticed.
eventually there would be signs.
there would be angels and shepherds
worshipping at His feet.
there would be dignitaries from afar
bearing gifts.
but He came in unnoticed
do we notice Him now?
do we notice all that He has done?
do we notice all that He is doing?
are we aware of what He is going to do?
i don't want Him
to be unnoticed in my life
God, keep me tender
to notice you at work
not only in my life,
but in all those around me.
i don't want You
to be unnoticed in my life
no red carpet
no media
nothing obvious
it blows my mind to think that God entered this world
in the most unnoticed of ways.
no grandeur
no phenomenal signs or wonders
nothing to set Him apart
God entered the world
through a frail teenage girl.
He came in unexpected ways.
He came unnoticed.
eventually there would be signs.
there would be angels and shepherds
worshipping at His feet.
there would be dignitaries from afar
bearing gifts.
but He came in unnoticed
do we notice Him now?
do we notice all that He has done?
do we notice all that He is doing?
are we aware of what He is going to do?
i don't want Him
to be unnoticed in my life
God, keep me tender
to notice you at work
not only in my life,
but in all those around me.
i don't want You
to be unnoticed in my life
Monday, December 17, 2007
early Christmas
this past weekend, we had Christmas early.
i always love having Christmas early--it's something i've always grown up doing.
with families out of town, we always got to have our immediate family's Christmases early,
so we were fortunate to open gifts early and then do our best to keep things a little hush-hush because we wanted to help keep the excitement for everyone else who was waiting for the 25th.
got to see my siblings and their spouses (and their dogs),
got to play games together (congrats on the tie d.g. :) )
and see who had who for our present exchange.
there were lots of laughs as we were playing a new game my sister-in-law shared
with chocolate flying back and forth across the room,
flying paper as the boys were opening their gifts and wanting to show everyone,
tears as we read a letter to each one of us from my mom and dad
(good tears, not sad ones)
and quick catch-ups before it was back to the middle of december.
on our way home, i felt so overwhelmed, so filled with gratitude.
presents are nice, but feeling loved and connected is so much more.
gifts that were given meant something because thought and time were put into them.
the gift was nice, but the meaning behind it meant far more.
it was fun to give, it was overwhelming to receive.
i love my family--with all of our quirks like needing to take several hundred pictures in a few days,
having a gift exchange just for the pets, or watching the same movie a couple times in the same weekend because we are talking through it.
i love that our tradition of early Christmas hasn't changed.
i always love having Christmas early--it's something i've always grown up doing.
with families out of town, we always got to have our immediate family's Christmases early,
so we were fortunate to open gifts early and then do our best to keep things a little hush-hush because we wanted to help keep the excitement for everyone else who was waiting for the 25th.
got to see my siblings and their spouses (and their dogs),
got to play games together (congrats on the tie d.g. :) )
and see who had who for our present exchange.
there were lots of laughs as we were playing a new game my sister-in-law shared
with chocolate flying back and forth across the room,
flying paper as the boys were opening their gifts and wanting to show everyone,
tears as we read a letter to each one of us from my mom and dad
(good tears, not sad ones)
and quick catch-ups before it was back to the middle of december.
on our way home, i felt so overwhelmed, so filled with gratitude.
presents are nice, but feeling loved and connected is so much more.
gifts that were given meant something because thought and time were put into them.
the gift was nice, but the meaning behind it meant far more.
it was fun to give, it was overwhelming to receive.
i love my family--with all of our quirks like needing to take several hundred pictures in a few days,
having a gift exchange just for the pets, or watching the same movie a couple times in the same weekend because we are talking through it.
i love that our tradition of early Christmas hasn't changed.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
the beginning
holidays are always an interesting time
and they seem to intensify so many things...
anxiety, emotion, tension,
thankfulness, humbleness, love and forgiveness...
as mentioned previously, it's been a tough year.
unexpected things happening several times over.
things turning out differently than planned.
new directions and blessings that come with it all.
had a reminder today to really remember
what Christmas is all about.
it's not about gifts and busy activities
or even about doing things for others.
God meant it for one thing--
we are to remember His love and His grace.
we are to remember and reflect on the fact
that God gifted us with His most precious--
His only Son, a perfect gift in every sense of the word.
we could leave it at that, remembering that
God gifted each one in this world
with His perfect Son.
but that would be missing the point too.
God gave His Son,
knowing that He would die
a most gruesome, lonely death.
God gave His Son
knowing that He would die
for each one of us--
a terrible, heavy price to pay.
Christmas is the beginning--
God coming into this world
in an unexpected way.
Easter is the goal--
Jesus paying the ultimate price
for each one of our sins
by dying on cross,
a price He didn't have to pay.
And a future day will be the culmination--
when He comes again
and all will be made whole and complete.
Christmas is just the beginning
of something far grander.
and they seem to intensify so many things...
anxiety, emotion, tension,
thankfulness, humbleness, love and forgiveness...
as mentioned previously, it's been a tough year.
unexpected things happening several times over.
things turning out differently than planned.
new directions and blessings that come with it all.
had a reminder today to really remember
what Christmas is all about.
it's not about gifts and busy activities
or even about doing things for others.
God meant it for one thing--
we are to remember His love and His grace.
we are to remember and reflect on the fact
that God gifted us with His most precious--
His only Son, a perfect gift in every sense of the word.
we could leave it at that, remembering that
God gifted each one in this world
with His perfect Son.
but that would be missing the point too.
God gave His Son,
knowing that He would die
a most gruesome, lonely death.
God gave His Son
knowing that He would die
for each one of us--
a terrible, heavy price to pay.
Christmas is the beginning--
God coming into this world
in an unexpected way.
Easter is the goal--
Jesus paying the ultimate price
for each one of our sins
by dying on cross,
a price He didn't have to pay.
And a future day will be the culmination--
when He comes again
and all will be made whole and complete.
Christmas is just the beginning
of something far grander.
Monday, December 10, 2007
fresh snow
we've had a couple little snowfalls already this month.
another coming tonight and tomorrow.
the trees are absolutely beautiful
with their white frosted limbs and soft dusting of glittery white.
something interesting happens when you have multiple snows
with a little bit of time in between.
first, the snow is that crisp, clean, sparkling white.
give it a few days and it begins to get that grimy color
from traffic and the dirt that seeps up
and turns it to that dull brown and gray.
a little more snow falls again and it all looks brand new.
you don't see that grime underneath...
you just see that crisp, clean sparkling blanket of fresh snow.
it's all new and pure and clean.
looking at it, it makes me ponder a bit about how we are.
we need that fresh cover too--
only ours needs to come from the inside,
not just a surface covering.
thank goodness we have that fresh start
in Jesus Christ.
another coming tonight and tomorrow.
the trees are absolutely beautiful
with their white frosted limbs and soft dusting of glittery white.
something interesting happens when you have multiple snows
with a little bit of time in between.
first, the snow is that crisp, clean, sparkling white.
give it a few days and it begins to get that grimy color
from traffic and the dirt that seeps up
and turns it to that dull brown and gray.
a little more snow falls again and it all looks brand new.
you don't see that grime underneath...
you just see that crisp, clean sparkling blanket of fresh snow.
it's all new and pure and clean.
looking at it, it makes me ponder a bit about how we are.
we need that fresh cover too--
only ours needs to come from the inside,
not just a surface covering.
thank goodness we have that fresh start
in Jesus Christ.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
unexplainable
this past week, some surreal events have happened a little too close to home.
in omaha, a young man chose to randomly shoot people and then himself in a mall that i go to now and then.
in colorado springs, an individual shot at people as they were coming out of church on a sunday morning, a church that we love to visit when we are in the area.
in the denver area, a man chose to shoot people who were in training to become missionaries.
i don't know why God allowed these things to happen, but i pray that these senseless acts will cause people to turn to God and to trust in Him--allowing themselves to be loved by a God that wants love them more than anything else.
i will trust God in these situations--even though i can't explain why He would allow something like this to happen.
in omaha, a young man chose to randomly shoot people and then himself in a mall that i go to now and then.
in colorado springs, an individual shot at people as they were coming out of church on a sunday morning, a church that we love to visit when we are in the area.
in the denver area, a man chose to shoot people who were in training to become missionaries.
i don't know why God allowed these things to happen, but i pray that these senseless acts will cause people to turn to God and to trust in Him--allowing themselves to be loved by a God that wants love them more than anything else.
i will trust God in these situations--even though i can't explain why He would allow something like this to happen.
worlds colliding
we all have a past, we all are in our present and we all have a future. it's interesting when they all meet together.
this weekend was our church's christmas production. it's a time that's filled with activity and also has plenty of moments to enjoy--gathering with friends and performances... our production including collaborating with two other local churches--a very cool thing. one of the collaborations was a presentation of handel's messiah.
as i was playing my flute, i got to experience a coming together of things from my past and things of the present and caused me to ponder my future. one of my previous college advisors was playing his violin and helping with rehearsal details--was fun to see him again and to learn from him again. also made me think back to choices that i made in college--switching majors and colleges. made me ponder some 'what if's'. was there with folks from the church and ministry i currently serve in--and that's always a joy and privilege. was really special to see people from multiple churches come together and present something to God together. i really enjoyed it.
i wasn't expecting the event to cause me to contemplate so many things. what if i didn't change majors and stayed in music? what if i hadn't changed jobs when i did? why am i terrible at keeping up with relationships from days past when i truly do miss friends from those days? why did i feel like switching majors was the only option at that time in my life? what is God trying to teach me right now, bringing two worlds together in the same moments? how is my past helping and encouraging my present that will impact my future? what is God going to do next in my life?
i appreciate so many of the things that happened in my past...they have helped shape who i am today. i'm anxious to see how the events and things of the present are going to shape my future--He has brought so many things into my life this past year that can't be happening without a reason.
God works in mysterious ways--using ordinary events and things to grow and shape us--taking things from the past to grow us into our future.
this weekend was our church's christmas production. it's a time that's filled with activity and also has plenty of moments to enjoy--gathering with friends and performances... our production including collaborating with two other local churches--a very cool thing. one of the collaborations was a presentation of handel's messiah.
as i was playing my flute, i got to experience a coming together of things from my past and things of the present and caused me to ponder my future. one of my previous college advisors was playing his violin and helping with rehearsal details--was fun to see him again and to learn from him again. also made me think back to choices that i made in college--switching majors and colleges. made me ponder some 'what if's'. was there with folks from the church and ministry i currently serve in--and that's always a joy and privilege. was really special to see people from multiple churches come together and present something to God together. i really enjoyed it.
i wasn't expecting the event to cause me to contemplate so many things. what if i didn't change majors and stayed in music? what if i hadn't changed jobs when i did? why am i terrible at keeping up with relationships from days past when i truly do miss friends from those days? why did i feel like switching majors was the only option at that time in my life? what is God trying to teach me right now, bringing two worlds together in the same moments? how is my past helping and encouraging my present that will impact my future? what is God going to do next in my life?
i appreciate so many of the things that happened in my past...they have helped shape who i am today. i'm anxious to see how the events and things of the present are going to shape my future--He has brought so many things into my life this past year that can't be happening without a reason.
God works in mysterious ways--using ordinary events and things to grow and shape us--taking things from the past to grow us into our future.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
it isn't always a rat race
had a revelation today...guess you could call it that.
in the middle of prepping some things for work this evening, i stopped for a few minutes and walked around the building. there were all kinds of things going on--things being cleaned and set up, people practicing and decorating, last minute touches being added here and there.
i have done my best to pace getting things ready for today--not leaving everything to the last minute. in general, i like to think ahead, figure out what can get done early and efficiently and enjoy the run to the finish line. i've enjoyed today--i wasn't crazy or harried or overwhelmed. i was just doing the things that could only be done today. that afforded me time for my little walk.
that walk made me think...how much do we miss because we are running around, trying to get everything we think needs to be done at this moment instead of pulling back, pacing ourselves through life, and enjoying the journey?
there are times when i am missing things all around because i have things right in front of my face and i am dealing with my consequences for not thinking ahead...but not today. i'm enjoying today.
hope you are enjoying the journey today too.
in the middle of prepping some things for work this evening, i stopped for a few minutes and walked around the building. there were all kinds of things going on--things being cleaned and set up, people practicing and decorating, last minute touches being added here and there.
i have done my best to pace getting things ready for today--not leaving everything to the last minute. in general, i like to think ahead, figure out what can get done early and efficiently and enjoy the run to the finish line. i've enjoyed today--i wasn't crazy or harried or overwhelmed. i was just doing the things that could only be done today. that afforded me time for my little walk.
that walk made me think...how much do we miss because we are running around, trying to get everything we think needs to be done at this moment instead of pulling back, pacing ourselves through life, and enjoying the journey?
there are times when i am missing things all around because i have things right in front of my face and i am dealing with my consequences for not thinking ahead...but not today. i'm enjoying today.
hope you are enjoying the journey today too.
Monday, December 3, 2007
moments
time is a very precious gift--
so precious that it is only given to us
moment by moment.
~amelia barr
so precious that it is only given to us
moment by moment.
~amelia barr
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
overwhelmed
from the middle of november to the beginning of january is always a bit of a blur to me.
colin's birthday leads right into thanksgiving.
the day after thanksgiving is practically christmas now.
christmas production at church.
school christmas, excuse me, winter holiday, things.
one extended family christmas get-together.
visits to those before christmas that we won't be able to see at christmas.
our immediate family christmas together.
another extended family christmas get-together followed by another the next morning.
a few days to pick up and do laundry and do 'normal' things.
new year's eve and new year's day
which leads right into carter's birthday.
and finally back to school and 'normal' again.
at the moment, it seems like a bit much. it is overwhelming.
looking at the list reminds me of how intentional we have to be to really stop and look at what christmas is truly all about.
looking at the list reminds me of how God put so many things together to truly celebrate and i better not miss that opportunity in the middle of the busyness.
the joy of my youngest son and all that God put into him--his sweet spirit and energy and drive and humor...
taking time to remember all that there is to be thankful for.
the opportunity to serve in a church body and to reach out to others.
a wonderful school that does all kinds of things to encourage our kids in learning and growth.
family and friends that we love and that love us.
a chance for my family to share and give to each other.
A MOMENT TO STOP AND LOOK AT THAT ONE QUIET, UNASSUMING EVENING WHEN GOD ENTERED THE WORLD AS A BABY, KNOWING THAT HE WOULD DIE FOR EACH ONE OF OUR SINS BECAUSE HE LOVES US SO MUCH.
a fresh start of a new year and all the promise that it holds.
the joy of my oldest son and all that God put into him--his tender heart and his processess and humor...
an overwhelming, but incredible season of life.
colin's birthday leads right into thanksgiving.
the day after thanksgiving is practically christmas now.
christmas production at church.
school christmas, excuse me, winter holiday, things.
one extended family christmas get-together.
visits to those before christmas that we won't be able to see at christmas.
our immediate family christmas together.
another extended family christmas get-together followed by another the next morning.
a few days to pick up and do laundry and do 'normal' things.
new year's eve and new year's day
which leads right into carter's birthday.
and finally back to school and 'normal' again.
at the moment, it seems like a bit much. it is overwhelming.
looking at the list reminds me of how intentional we have to be to really stop and look at what christmas is truly all about.
looking at the list reminds me of how God put so many things together to truly celebrate and i better not miss that opportunity in the middle of the busyness.
the joy of my youngest son and all that God put into him--his sweet spirit and energy and drive and humor...
taking time to remember all that there is to be thankful for.
the opportunity to serve in a church body and to reach out to others.
a wonderful school that does all kinds of things to encourage our kids in learning and growth.
family and friends that we love and that love us.
a chance for my family to share and give to each other.
A MOMENT TO STOP AND LOOK AT THAT ONE QUIET, UNASSUMING EVENING WHEN GOD ENTERED THE WORLD AS A BABY, KNOWING THAT HE WOULD DIE FOR EACH ONE OF OUR SINS BECAUSE HE LOVES US SO MUCH.
a fresh start of a new year and all the promise that it holds.
the joy of my oldest son and all that God put into him--his tender heart and his processess and humor...
an overwhelming, but incredible season of life.
not too busy to be thankful
i haven't had the opportunity to blog for a bit.
colin's multiple birthday get-togethers, thanksgiving--multiple get-togethers, suicide shopping the day after thanksgiving, driving to see extended family, work and gearing up for christmas production...
been so busy, yet i have to say that there has been a calm in the middle of it all. strange.
i am so thankful for so many things and to just list them doesn't seem to do things justice.
but i shall begin with a list because i don't know where else to start...
--i'm thankful for a God that loves me in all things, that is in control of all things, that uses all things for His good, that blesses when we least deserve and gives grace despite who we are. because of Him, there are so many things to be thankful for.
--i'm thankful for my family. i have a husband who is my best friend, boys who make me smile every day and night, and my cat...who we could probably say that i'm more thankful for than my husband is of him. i have a mom and dad who have always loved and supported me and will be my cheerleader when i am down and who are phenomenal grandparents to my boys. i have extended family that despite all our quirks come together and can just enjoy being together. i could go on and on about family...
--i'm thankful for dear friends. we have friends that live far away and friends that live 10 minutes from our house that i just couldn't imagine going through life without. they are always there when i've needed someone to laugh with or cry with or complain to or talk things out. i'm SO grateful.
--i think of all the physical needs that God meets in our lives. we have a home and vehicles that get us from here to there, clothes and food and toiletries and what we consider the basics here in america. bills get paid and new 'toys' come and trips are taken. we are so blessed that i am truly humbled. so many go without in this world and i have more than what i know to do with.
--i am thankful that God grants us each gifts and skills and abilities and things in this life that we can pass on to others, that we can make a difference in other people's lives. He never meant for us to live life alone or selflessly and i am grateful
so many things to be thankful for...
glad for the opportunity of thanksgiving to think a little more poingantly about it.
God is good.
colin's multiple birthday get-togethers, thanksgiving--multiple get-togethers, suicide shopping the day after thanksgiving, driving to see extended family, work and gearing up for christmas production...
been so busy, yet i have to say that there has been a calm in the middle of it all. strange.
i am so thankful for so many things and to just list them doesn't seem to do things justice.
but i shall begin with a list because i don't know where else to start...
--i'm thankful for a God that loves me in all things, that is in control of all things, that uses all things for His good, that blesses when we least deserve and gives grace despite who we are. because of Him, there are so many things to be thankful for.
--i'm thankful for my family. i have a husband who is my best friend, boys who make me smile every day and night, and my cat...who we could probably say that i'm more thankful for than my husband is of him. i have a mom and dad who have always loved and supported me and will be my cheerleader when i am down and who are phenomenal grandparents to my boys. i have extended family that despite all our quirks come together and can just enjoy being together. i could go on and on about family...
--i'm thankful for dear friends. we have friends that live far away and friends that live 10 minutes from our house that i just couldn't imagine going through life without. they are always there when i've needed someone to laugh with or cry with or complain to or talk things out. i'm SO grateful.
--i think of all the physical needs that God meets in our lives. we have a home and vehicles that get us from here to there, clothes and food and toiletries and what we consider the basics here in america. bills get paid and new 'toys' come and trips are taken. we are so blessed that i am truly humbled. so many go without in this world and i have more than what i know to do with.
--i am thankful that God grants us each gifts and skills and abilities and things in this life that we can pass on to others, that we can make a difference in other people's lives. He never meant for us to live life alone or selflessly and i am grateful
so many things to be thankful for...
glad for the opportunity of thanksgiving to think a little more poingantly about it.
God is good.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
i am the
parenting moment--
my almost three-year-old was in a mood. fighting back on whatever--what was chosen for lunch, what movie to watch, naptime...and we won't even go into potty training. i was about up to here with it and in a prime moment when i let colin know we needed to go upstairs because we needed to pick up, he sassed right back.
'no' in a most emphatic tone--with eyebrows furrowed and grumpy eyes.
i told him again and he was even more emphatic with me 'no...i not go...you don't boss me.'
mom lost it. 'we are going upstairs. you DO NOT talk back to me like that--i am the mom.'
his reply (with finger pointed back at me, borderline yelling at me): 'i am the colin'
yes, you are sweetie.
i have to admit, i laughed--then he laughed--and amazingly enough, went upstairs.
sad thing is...when he is about to get into trouble now, he looks at you, gets his pointer finger out and says boldly "i am the colin".
hate to say--makes me smile every time :)
my almost three-year-old was in a mood. fighting back on whatever--what was chosen for lunch, what movie to watch, naptime...and we won't even go into potty training. i was about up to here with it and in a prime moment when i let colin know we needed to go upstairs because we needed to pick up, he sassed right back.
'no' in a most emphatic tone--with eyebrows furrowed and grumpy eyes.
i told him again and he was even more emphatic with me 'no...i not go...you don't boss me.'
mom lost it. 'we are going upstairs. you DO NOT talk back to me like that--i am the mom.'
his reply (with finger pointed back at me, borderline yelling at me): 'i am the colin'
yes, you are sweetie.
i have to admit, i laughed--then he laughed--and amazingly enough, went upstairs.
sad thing is...when he is about to get into trouble now, he looks at you, gets his pointer finger out and says boldly "i am the colin".
hate to say--makes me smile every time :)
inquiring mind wants to know
why are the holidays so stressful, when they were created to be a time of remembrance, of reflection, a time of just being together?
why do we pretend to be something different than who we are?
why is it so much more difficult to receive help than to give it?
why do some people find one thing beautiful and someone else sees that thing as insignificant?
why does a bad hair day affect our outlook on the whole day?
why do we doubt God when He puts difficulties in our path?
why do we limit God in what He can do in our everyday?
why am i in an inquisitive mood today???
why do we pretend to be something different than who we are?
why is it so much more difficult to receive help than to give it?
why do some people find one thing beautiful and someone else sees that thing as insignificant?
why does a bad hair day affect our outlook on the whole day?
why do we doubt God when He puts difficulties in our path?
why do we limit God in what He can do in our everyday?
why am i in an inquisitive mood today???
Thursday, November 15, 2007
ending or beginning
there will come a time
when you believe
everything is finished.
that will be the beginning.
~louis l'amour
when you believe
everything is finished.
that will be the beginning.
~louis l'amour
flashback
had a thing at my son's school on tuesday night.
tons of people and some fun things planned for the kids...
i recognized someone's face--
someone that you know you should know their name.
finally got up the guts to say...'is your name amy?'
a smile came across her face...'yes...'
'did you used to live in g.i.?' (my hometown) 'yes...'
and two and two came together.
the last time i saw amy was when i was in elementary school.
we attended the same church growing up
and our moms' names were almost identical,
so we always joked about that.
found out that she has a daughter a grade below carter's
and they just started at this school not that long ago.
we said our 'we'll see you soon--maybe in the line after school' comments and left.
later on, it was strange that the one encounter
brought back all these memories that i really hadn't remembered in years.
the way our ccd rooms smelled,
singing in the children's choir together...
one encounter helped spark a bunch of memories.
funny how that works...i'm wondering, is this an early sign of alzheimer's--
not realizing how much you've forgotten?
tons of people and some fun things planned for the kids...
i recognized someone's face--
someone that you know you should know their name.
finally got up the guts to say...'is your name amy?'
a smile came across her face...'yes...'
'did you used to live in g.i.?' (my hometown) 'yes...'
and two and two came together.
the last time i saw amy was when i was in elementary school.
we attended the same church growing up
and our moms' names were almost identical,
so we always joked about that.
found out that she has a daughter a grade below carter's
and they just started at this school not that long ago.
we said our 'we'll see you soon--maybe in the line after school' comments and left.
later on, it was strange that the one encounter
brought back all these memories that i really hadn't remembered in years.
the way our ccd rooms smelled,
singing in the children's choir together...
one encounter helped spark a bunch of memories.
funny how that works...i'm wondering, is this an early sign of alzheimer's--
not realizing how much you've forgotten?
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
need vs. want
my almost three year old made me laugh today.
he's coming down with a cold, so his nose is all junky
and we are wiping it with a tissue about every fifteen seconds.
from all the wiping, it's getting sore and bothering him.
he came to me with a handful of tootsie rolls saying that
he NEEDS the tootsie rolls because his nose hurts.
i asked if he needs them or if he really just wants them.
he said he NEEDS the tootsie rolls because if he's chewing them
his nose won't hurt. (logical...something tasty (and chocolate)
to distract from pain. as a mother, should i be proud that he's
figured this out???)
i let him have one. (he was cute and batting his sweet eyes...)
moments later:
"mommy, i need two tootsie rolls this time,
this side of my nose hurts more."
he's good...very good.
he's coming down with a cold, so his nose is all junky
and we are wiping it with a tissue about every fifteen seconds.
from all the wiping, it's getting sore and bothering him.
he came to me with a handful of tootsie rolls saying that
he NEEDS the tootsie rolls because his nose hurts.
i asked if he needs them or if he really just wants them.
he said he NEEDS the tootsie rolls because if he's chewing them
his nose won't hurt. (logical...something tasty (and chocolate)
to distract from pain. as a mother, should i be proud that he's
figured this out???)
i let him have one. (he was cute and batting his sweet eyes...)
moments later:
"mommy, i need two tootsie rolls this time,
this side of my nose hurts more."
he's good...very good.
Thursday, November 8, 2007
had to laugh
okay...this is how brillant humans are.
cooking one of those freezer pizzas--at the bottom corner:
'cook before serving'
don't forget that!
cooking one of those freezer pizzas--at the bottom corner:
'cook before serving'
don't forget that!
i need you and you need me
i work at a church. it is something i feel i have been called to as a vocation.
for most of my growing up, i wanted to be a music teacher.
i knew at the core of my being, that was what i was going to be.
then something happened. in college, i had an experience that radically changed my life.
God opened my eyes and i knew i wanted to have a personal relationship the rest of my life with Him.
it changed my plans. it changed my educational direction.
it changed what i thought i wanted to be when i grew up.
i now have church as my vocation and i am grateful.
i've spent the last few weeks pondering over the unique creation of the church.
i'm not referring to organized religion or some cult, but the unique living organism created by a community of believers--people who have asked God to have a personal relationship through the living sacrifice of Jesus Christ.
church is an amazingly complex thing.
simply, it's people coming together under the main thing they have in common--
--Jesus Christ and the love we have for Him because He died for each one of us.
look deeper and you see how God crafted each church/community in infinitely complex ways.
He brought people together--flawed, imperfect people who are growing towards all that He wanted for them to become. He brought young and old, uncivilized and refined, free-spirited thinkers and organizers, creative and analytical and brought them together to change the world by loving one another and living differently than the rest of the world, to live out life as Jesus did when He was here on earth.
the thing i'm learning to appreciate in this community is how God never intended for any one of us to be able to 'do church' on our own. we need each other. God designed it that way. i can't write a sermon to help share Jesus' story with the masses to save my life, but others in my church community can. i am not gifted at making stories from the Bible come to life to the little children, but my church community has people who are passionate and able to make the stories jump right off the pages. for every need, He has brought someone with that exact gift, strength, talent. we need each other!!! in the Bible, God uses the imagry of the body. an eye can't do a hand's job and a foot better not try to do the job of the heart. (what about the appendix? is that one really necessary? i mean, it can be removed and we can survive just fine. hope i'm not the appendix :) )
each one brings a unique contribution that some other part is relying on to help the whole function.
if a part is suppressed or shut down, the whole hurts. it's maimed and not operating at its capacity.
the hand counts on the fingers. the legs need the feet to help them get places. the heart counts on those blood vessels to distribute the reoxgygenated blood to the whole body.
each little part is as important as the next.
it's just a small reminder to me how God put things in me that others need.
God put things in others that i need.
we need each other.
for most of my growing up, i wanted to be a music teacher.
i knew at the core of my being, that was what i was going to be.
then something happened. in college, i had an experience that radically changed my life.
God opened my eyes and i knew i wanted to have a personal relationship the rest of my life with Him.
it changed my plans. it changed my educational direction.
it changed what i thought i wanted to be when i grew up.
i now have church as my vocation and i am grateful.
i've spent the last few weeks pondering over the unique creation of the church.
i'm not referring to organized religion or some cult, but the unique living organism created by a community of believers--people who have asked God to have a personal relationship through the living sacrifice of Jesus Christ.
church is an amazingly complex thing.
simply, it's people coming together under the main thing they have in common--
--Jesus Christ and the love we have for Him because He died for each one of us.
look deeper and you see how God crafted each church/community in infinitely complex ways.
He brought people together--flawed, imperfect people who are growing towards all that He wanted for them to become. He brought young and old, uncivilized and refined, free-spirited thinkers and organizers, creative and analytical and brought them together to change the world by loving one another and living differently than the rest of the world, to live out life as Jesus did when He was here on earth.
the thing i'm learning to appreciate in this community is how God never intended for any one of us to be able to 'do church' on our own. we need each other. God designed it that way. i can't write a sermon to help share Jesus' story with the masses to save my life, but others in my church community can. i am not gifted at making stories from the Bible come to life to the little children, but my church community has people who are passionate and able to make the stories jump right off the pages. for every need, He has brought someone with that exact gift, strength, talent. we need each other!!! in the Bible, God uses the imagry of the body. an eye can't do a hand's job and a foot better not try to do the job of the heart. (what about the appendix? is that one really necessary? i mean, it can be removed and we can survive just fine. hope i'm not the appendix :) )
each one brings a unique contribution that some other part is relying on to help the whole function.
if a part is suppressed or shut down, the whole hurts. it's maimed and not operating at its capacity.
the hand counts on the fingers. the legs need the feet to help them get places. the heart counts on those blood vessels to distribute the reoxgygenated blood to the whole body.
each little part is as important as the next.
it's just a small reminder to me how God put things in me that others need.
God put things in others that i need.
we need each other.
Monday, November 5, 2007
my response?
was looking at the book of habakkuk in the old testament. was having a tough time reading through because i was rushing and not looking at the context of things. made myself read again, and then one more time. though this was written in days long ago in situations that i personally can't relate to (national conquest and major violence seen first hand), God has been slowly letting me chew on it...realizing that there are some very pertinent lessons for right now.
first, i decided i would love to have habakkuk as my friend. (would want to come up with a nickname of some sort though--habakkuk doesn't roll off the tongue or type easily) he's bold and he's honest. he readily admits his fears and concerns (with great detail too). he has no problem asking honest questions and asking for a response--why is all this tough stuff happening? don't you see it, God? You can do something about it! he engages in his conversation with great emotion and passion. he cares for what is taking place to him and the world around him. he trusts in a God that is in control of a situation that seems out of control to him, in a situation that appears that God has nothing to do with it.
second, habakkuk gives time for God to talk--even when the answer isn't one that he expected or wanted. i don't know what the real life conversation was like, but here in the text, habakkuk shuts up after his comments and questions and then listens to what God has to say. boy, it's easy to talk--tough to wait and listen.
i think what floors me the most about this passage is two-fold.
there is such an open dialogue between habakkuk and God. questions and answers. feelings and explanations. candid thoughts with loving, honest replies. no feelings or comments were minced or shaded--things were spoken so openly. we can learn from that today--we all can have that type of candor with God. personally, i've learned that when i try to say the right things to God instead of how i really feel or what i really want to ask, i'm disappointed every time. but when i come to God with everything exposed, there is such a tender God there that loves me through--speaking and answering in ways that touch me to the core of who i am. (even though i may have expected God to answer things differently or switch to doing something my way)
i adore habakkuk's response at the end of the passage.
(chapter three, verses seventeen and eighteen)
Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.
God didn't give habakkuk the answer he may have necessarily wanted or circumstances that seemed just in his perspective. but habakkuk's choice was to praise a God that is in control of all things, despite what was going on around him. i love how habakkuk was free to list all the things that weren't going right around him--he was simply showing us that there are all kinds of reasons to doubt God's timing and plan, all kinds of reasons to simply draw inward and cry against a God that would allow such. BUT, there is that last statement:
YET i will rejoice in the Lord, i will be joyful in God my Savior.
in the middle of the difficulties, his response was praise. it was joy (which is so much different than happiness). God is still God despite the difficulties of things around us. He is using those difficulties to shape us to grow more of His character--to be more loving, more kind, more patient, more understanding, more tender, more thoughtful, more forgiving...
i have to ask myself: is this my response? when life is hard and things go differently than i wanted or expected, is my response like habakkuk's? i would like to think so...at least some.
first, i decided i would love to have habakkuk as my friend. (would want to come up with a nickname of some sort though--habakkuk doesn't roll off the tongue or type easily) he's bold and he's honest. he readily admits his fears and concerns (with great detail too). he has no problem asking honest questions and asking for a response--why is all this tough stuff happening? don't you see it, God? You can do something about it! he engages in his conversation with great emotion and passion. he cares for what is taking place to him and the world around him. he trusts in a God that is in control of a situation that seems out of control to him, in a situation that appears that God has nothing to do with it.
second, habakkuk gives time for God to talk--even when the answer isn't one that he expected or wanted. i don't know what the real life conversation was like, but here in the text, habakkuk shuts up after his comments and questions and then listens to what God has to say. boy, it's easy to talk--tough to wait and listen.
i think what floors me the most about this passage is two-fold.
there is such an open dialogue between habakkuk and God. questions and answers. feelings and explanations. candid thoughts with loving, honest replies. no feelings or comments were minced or shaded--things were spoken so openly. we can learn from that today--we all can have that type of candor with God. personally, i've learned that when i try to say the right things to God instead of how i really feel or what i really want to ask, i'm disappointed every time. but when i come to God with everything exposed, there is such a tender God there that loves me through--speaking and answering in ways that touch me to the core of who i am. (even though i may have expected God to answer things differently or switch to doing something my way)
i adore habakkuk's response at the end of the passage.
(chapter three, verses seventeen and eighteen)
Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.
God didn't give habakkuk the answer he may have necessarily wanted or circumstances that seemed just in his perspective. but habakkuk's choice was to praise a God that is in control of all things, despite what was going on around him. i love how habakkuk was free to list all the things that weren't going right around him--he was simply showing us that there are all kinds of reasons to doubt God's timing and plan, all kinds of reasons to simply draw inward and cry against a God that would allow such. BUT, there is that last statement:
YET i will rejoice in the Lord, i will be joyful in God my Savior.
in the middle of the difficulties, his response was praise. it was joy (which is so much different than happiness). God is still God despite the difficulties of things around us. He is using those difficulties to shape us to grow more of His character--to be more loving, more kind, more patient, more understanding, more tender, more thoughtful, more forgiving...
i have to ask myself: is this my response? when life is hard and things go differently than i wanted or expected, is my response like habakkuk's? i would like to think so...at least some.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
true friends
today, i'm so grateful for my dear friends that take me as i am, that take my family as we are.
tired after a long day, cranky kids that are crashing from their halloween sugar buzz, distracted minds focused on all the to-do's that are piling up around. yet, we sit eating supper and watching a show together--catching up on life in between little ones asking for another cookie, throwing toys back and forth--building each other up while in the tough things of life.
they are a HUGE encouragement and i can't imagine going through life without them.
thank you dear friends!
p.s. the roast was good :)
tired after a long day, cranky kids that are crashing from their halloween sugar buzz, distracted minds focused on all the to-do's that are piling up around. yet, we sit eating supper and watching a show together--catching up on life in between little ones asking for another cookie, throwing toys back and forth--building each other up while in the tough things of life.
they are a HUGE encouragement and i can't imagine going through life without them.
thank you dear friends!
p.s. the roast was good :)
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
short days
days go slowly sometimes. then you blink and years seem like they were just yesterday.
our family has been working through the illness and passing of my father-in-law for the past weeks.
hospital waiting room days seemed like time was standing still. his passing happened quickly.
going through things is a reminder of how short and precious life is. we don't know when our last tomorrow will be. there are 'i love you's' and 'i'm sorry's' that need to be said while we can.
for there to be memories to treasure later, there need to be memorable moments now.
i look at my boys and i pray that someday when they are remembering their parents, i hope that they remember time that we've spent together reading stories and playing in the backyard and trips to the zoo, always looking for something that we've never seen before. i hope that they always marvel at the mountains, knowing the God that made them. i pray that they see how i've done my best to trust God in all things--that they remember how we pray every day in the car together, asking for God to show us something new about Him. i want them to see that all the little everyday things we do together are shaping them to be who they are and all the little moments are creating the memories that they can carry with them until they are old and gray.
this part of our journey has reminded me that life is short. we all know it, but we don't always make the most of it. this has been a reminder to be thankful for each day because it truly is a gift from God (as trite as that sounds). so...i've been reminded to live each day to its most, not knowing when the todays will come to an end.
(for a future post...i can ramble on about how when our last today here comes to an end, we have a most incredible tomorrow in front of us--God created the most incredible future for each one of us and paid a most lavish price for us to be with Him.)
our family has been working through the illness and passing of my father-in-law for the past weeks.
hospital waiting room days seemed like time was standing still. his passing happened quickly.
going through things is a reminder of how short and precious life is. we don't know when our last tomorrow will be. there are 'i love you's' and 'i'm sorry's' that need to be said while we can.
for there to be memories to treasure later, there need to be memorable moments now.
i look at my boys and i pray that someday when they are remembering their parents, i hope that they remember time that we've spent together reading stories and playing in the backyard and trips to the zoo, always looking for something that we've never seen before. i hope that they always marvel at the mountains, knowing the God that made them. i pray that they see how i've done my best to trust God in all things--that they remember how we pray every day in the car together, asking for God to show us something new about Him. i want them to see that all the little everyday things we do together are shaping them to be who they are and all the little moments are creating the memories that they can carry with them until they are old and gray.
this part of our journey has reminded me that life is short. we all know it, but we don't always make the most of it. this has been a reminder to be thankful for each day because it truly is a gift from God (as trite as that sounds). so...i've been reminded to live each day to its most, not knowing when the todays will come to an end.
(for a future post...i can ramble on about how when our last today here comes to an end, we have a most incredible tomorrow in front of us--God created the most incredible future for each one of us and paid a most lavish price for us to be with Him.)
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
pumpkin-eating squirrels
sounds like a horrible title to a grade b film. we have legions of pumpkin-eating squirrels in our neighborhood. it wasn't always this way. when we first moved into our home, we had your average, ordinary, run-of-the-mill squirrels. then they evolved...
every fall, i love to decorate with lots of pumpkins. earl may has had their ninety-nine cent pumpkins for years and i've taken full advantage of the deal. we don't carve them, just stagger them through the flower gardens, around my bench and by the door... nice, festive, and ties us over until it's time to get the christmas lights out.
acorns...we have lots of acorns. oak trees in several yards. but the squirrels wanted more.
maybe they got lectured that they really should increase the amount of produce in their diet. then they discovered them...the yard with pumpkins. the squirrels used to be nice and just eat a hole in one, clean it out and then eventually work their way to the next one.
now, they've invited their friends. i blinked and all the pumpkins have holes chewed in them. pumpkin guts and seeds trailing through my flower garden and around the bench and near the front door. i have to say that the squirrels are looking a bit plumper this year, all that pumpkin going straight to their hips.
will have to come up with an alternative next season. i am a bit frightened...not sure how they will evolve next.
every fall, i love to decorate with lots of pumpkins. earl may has had their ninety-nine cent pumpkins for years and i've taken full advantage of the deal. we don't carve them, just stagger them through the flower gardens, around my bench and by the door... nice, festive, and ties us over until it's time to get the christmas lights out.
acorns...we have lots of acorns. oak trees in several yards. but the squirrels wanted more.
maybe they got lectured that they really should increase the amount of produce in their diet. then they discovered them...the yard with pumpkins. the squirrels used to be nice and just eat a hole in one, clean it out and then eventually work their way to the next one.
now, they've invited their friends. i blinked and all the pumpkins have holes chewed in them. pumpkin guts and seeds trailing through my flower garden and around the bench and near the front door. i have to say that the squirrels are looking a bit plumper this year, all that pumpkin going straight to their hips.
will have to come up with an alternative next season. i am a bit frightened...not sure how they will evolve next.
mmmmmm...magnesium
i love chocolate. dark, milk, white, organic, from the cacao reserves...it's all good.
(okay, except the super cheap crappy stuff)
the best now is that they say that dark chocolate is a great source for magnesium.
what a great way to justify chocolate indulgance!
even m & m's have jumped on board. they have the regular and peanut and peanut butter and all the different colors to match whatever the latest holiday is (wonder what colors they pick for labor day?). there is almond and now...dark chocolate. i can get the essential magnesium into my diet by having it melt in my mouth and not in my hands.
be right back...feeling a lack of magnesium in my system...
(okay, except the super cheap crappy stuff)
the best now is that they say that dark chocolate is a great source for magnesium.
what a great way to justify chocolate indulgance!
even m & m's have jumped on board. they have the regular and peanut and peanut butter and all the different colors to match whatever the latest holiday is (wonder what colors they pick for labor day?). there is almond and now...dark chocolate. i can get the essential magnesium into my diet by having it melt in my mouth and not in my hands.
be right back...feeling a lack of magnesium in my system...
Monday, October 15, 2007
it's a rainy day and a monday
today is one of those days that i wish i could have just stayed in bed.
we've had gloomy, wet weather for days and i just want to see some sunshine and bask in the colors of fall.
(don't think i would fare well for an extended stay in seattle)
time seems to have come to a standstill and it seems like life is just extra-difficult right now.
normally, i would consider myself more of an idealist--one who sees that the best of everything is possible. i don't think i consider myself that today.
the cold medicine i'm taking isn't working.
my job didn't seem fulfilling today when it so often does.
it seems as though i've been cleaning for days and my house is a mess.
i've grocery shopped and cooked, but there's nothing to eat.
a prognosis for my father-in-law at the hospital isn't exactly optimistic.
my kids are maxed and tired, yet my little one took almost two hours to fall asleep.
in the Bible, God tells me who i am, yet i don't feel those things today at all.
i could sing like annie and bellow that 'the sun'll come out tomorrow'
but today i'll sing like the carpenters that 'rainy days and mondays always get me down'.
i know it's just a mood, a deep emotional funk.
(the idealist is creeping in...deep down i know that
tomorrow is a new day where all kinds of things are possible.)
but...today is a rainy day and a monday and we'll leave it at that.
we've had gloomy, wet weather for days and i just want to see some sunshine and bask in the colors of fall.
(don't think i would fare well for an extended stay in seattle)
time seems to have come to a standstill and it seems like life is just extra-difficult right now.
normally, i would consider myself more of an idealist--one who sees that the best of everything is possible. i don't think i consider myself that today.
the cold medicine i'm taking isn't working.
my job didn't seem fulfilling today when it so often does.
it seems as though i've been cleaning for days and my house is a mess.
i've grocery shopped and cooked, but there's nothing to eat.
a prognosis for my father-in-law at the hospital isn't exactly optimistic.
my kids are maxed and tired, yet my little one took almost two hours to fall asleep.
in the Bible, God tells me who i am, yet i don't feel those things today at all.
i could sing like annie and bellow that 'the sun'll come out tomorrow'
but today i'll sing like the carpenters that 'rainy days and mondays always get me down'.
i know it's just a mood, a deep emotional funk.
(the idealist is creeping in...deep down i know that
tomorrow is a new day where all kinds of things are possible.)
but...today is a rainy day and a monday and we'll leave it at that.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
shut up
i enjoy being a busy person. i love having eighteen things going all at once. (is that a mild form of a.d.d.?) i love cramming a ton of things into my day--kids, work, reading, typing, listening, walking, visiting... God has been teaching me for some time now on prioritizing all those things, that things have to come in a certain order for life to be lived with impact, with abundance. He comes first, my marriage and family second...and everything falls into an order in the list.
lately, God moved things to a slightly deeper level. good that you're getting things in order, but now I need you to shut up. I need you to be quiet, to be still, to listen, to wait. i have to say, i think i may have missed Him asking a few times because of all the noise. so God did what only God can do, He's cleared out some of the 'noise'.
for the past few months, there has been a time of silence in my day--every day. amazing how loud it is. at first, i didn't know what to do. i tried filling the time with activities, i cried, i yelled, i pouted by doing nothing. then...something dawned on me a bit ago--silence is such a gift. God has given me a time of silence each day to simply listen to Him. amazing that once you shift your perspective just a bit what you hear in that silence.
silence allows time to think, to reflect, to examine. it's given me opportunities to look at things in my life that i need to let God work on. it's encouraged me by letting me get away from the world that is spinning like crazy around me and regain perspective. it recharges, renews, refreshes.
been spending some time in psalm 46. go look at it. go to www.biblegateway.com if you don't have a bible and type in 'psalm 46' and see what it says. God uses this amazing contrast--the massive roars and crashes that happen in nature, the roars and yells of civilations as we clash with one another constrasted to His powers and what He can do...and then here's the clincher, it says to BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD. this passage has paragraphs of busy, noisy, overwhelming forces and then you have to be careful not to miss the quiet reminder at the end. don't miss it.
in the middle of the crashes and roars and feuds and battles and noise, God asks us to be still for just a moment and know that He is God. He is giving us a reminder at the end of this passage to make a concerted effort to find a still moment each day and remember who is God, who He is and who is in control.
i'm going to go and savor my small moments of silence today.
lately, God moved things to a slightly deeper level. good that you're getting things in order, but now I need you to shut up. I need you to be quiet, to be still, to listen, to wait. i have to say, i think i may have missed Him asking a few times because of all the noise. so God did what only God can do, He's cleared out some of the 'noise'.
for the past few months, there has been a time of silence in my day--every day. amazing how loud it is. at first, i didn't know what to do. i tried filling the time with activities, i cried, i yelled, i pouted by doing nothing. then...something dawned on me a bit ago--silence is such a gift. God has given me a time of silence each day to simply listen to Him. amazing that once you shift your perspective just a bit what you hear in that silence.
silence allows time to think, to reflect, to examine. it's given me opportunities to look at things in my life that i need to let God work on. it's encouraged me by letting me get away from the world that is spinning like crazy around me and regain perspective. it recharges, renews, refreshes.
been spending some time in psalm 46. go look at it. go to www.biblegateway.com if you don't have a bible and type in 'psalm 46' and see what it says. God uses this amazing contrast--the massive roars and crashes that happen in nature, the roars and yells of civilations as we clash with one another constrasted to His powers and what He can do...and then here's the clincher, it says to BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD. this passage has paragraphs of busy, noisy, overwhelming forces and then you have to be careful not to miss the quiet reminder at the end. don't miss it.
in the middle of the crashes and roars and feuds and battles and noise, God asks us to be still for just a moment and know that He is God. He is giving us a reminder at the end of this passage to make a concerted effort to find a still moment each day and remember who is God, who He is and who is in control.
i'm going to go and savor my small moments of silence today.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
sitting
isn't it interesting how sitting makes you tired?
been sitting in a hospital waiting room on and off over the last month or so. those days always wipe me out. i understand how running a marathon can wipe one out, how cleaning your house and doing yardwork can wipe one out, how parenting little ones can wipe one out. sitting and waiting is about the most exhausting of all.
think i might do laps around the halls later so i won't be wiped.
been sitting in a hospital waiting room on and off over the last month or so. those days always wipe me out. i understand how running a marathon can wipe one out, how cleaning your house and doing yardwork can wipe one out, how parenting little ones can wipe one out. sitting and waiting is about the most exhausting of all.
think i might do laps around the halls later so i won't be wiped.
Monday, October 1, 2007
purpose
God's various gifts are handed out everywhere,
but they all originate in God's Spirit.
God's various ministries are carried out everywhere;
but they all originate in God's Spirit.
God's various expressions of power are in action everywhere,
but God himself is behind it all.
Each person is given something to do that shows who God is:
Everyone gets in on it, everyone benefits.
All kinds of things are handed out by the Spirit,
and to all kinds of people.
The variety is wonderful:
wise counsel
clear understanding
simple trust
healing the sick
miraculous acts
proclamation
distinguishing between spirits
tongues
interpretation of tongues.
All these gifts have a common origin,
but are handed out one by one
by the one Spirit of God.
He decides who gets what and when.
1 Corinthians 12:4-11 (The Message translation)
each one of us is given something--a strength, a talent, a passion, an ability--that shows who God is to those around us. that amazes me. things that come naturally for me were placed inside by a God that wants me to show others who He is. (pretty humbling, isn't it?) there are things in you that God wants to use and speak through and tell others about Him.
honestly, i know i don't always show Him the best. i let myself get in the way and don't let Him be seen. this passage is a great reminder to me...it never has been about me--it's always been about God and Him wanting to show a world how much He loves them. He uses all people in all ages to share His message--He does it in a numberless amount of ways. i know God has used friends in my life to help with wise counsel in difficult situations or help me to understand something that i had been wrestling with. i've seen people come out on the other side of a cancer diagnosis free of disease that can only be attributed to God's miraculous power. because someone gives and serves, someone who is in need will be okay for another day.
because of God's goodness to us, we can be good to others. because He meets our needs, we can help others. because He loves us, we can love others. God makes each one of us who we are with one purpose in mind--each one of us, in our own unique way, can show the world who God is.
but they all originate in God's Spirit.
God's various ministries are carried out everywhere;
but they all originate in God's Spirit.
God's various expressions of power are in action everywhere,
but God himself is behind it all.
Each person is given something to do that shows who God is:
Everyone gets in on it, everyone benefits.
All kinds of things are handed out by the Spirit,
and to all kinds of people.
The variety is wonderful:
wise counsel
clear understanding
simple trust
healing the sick
miraculous acts
proclamation
distinguishing between spirits
tongues
interpretation of tongues.
All these gifts have a common origin,
but are handed out one by one
by the one Spirit of God.
He decides who gets what and when.
1 Corinthians 12:4-11 (The Message translation)
each one of us is given something--a strength, a talent, a passion, an ability--that shows who God is to those around us. that amazes me. things that come naturally for me were placed inside by a God that wants me to show others who He is. (pretty humbling, isn't it?) there are things in you that God wants to use and speak through and tell others about Him.
honestly, i know i don't always show Him the best. i let myself get in the way and don't let Him be seen. this passage is a great reminder to me...it never has been about me--it's always been about God and Him wanting to show a world how much He loves them. He uses all people in all ages to share His message--He does it in a numberless amount of ways. i know God has used friends in my life to help with wise counsel in difficult situations or help me to understand something that i had been wrestling with. i've seen people come out on the other side of a cancer diagnosis free of disease that can only be attributed to God's miraculous power. because someone gives and serves, someone who is in need will be okay for another day.
because of God's goodness to us, we can be good to others. because He meets our needs, we can help others. because He loves us, we can love others. God makes each one of us who we are with one purpose in mind--each one of us, in our own unique way, can show the world who God is.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
mandatory naptime
i think that we should have a mandatory naptime each day--babies, toddlers, kids, students, adults... think about the profound impact that would have on the world: people would be less crazy, cranky, maxed out... other cultures have this practice--why can't we learn from them?
my two year old missed his nap today. the world is not the same when he misses his nap. let me clarify, MY world is not the same when he misses his nap. short fuse, tears that come quickly, a tantrum here and there, things that he normally enjoys or finds funny put him over the top (with me coming quickly after).
thank goodness--he is now peacefully asleep in his little bed with his blanket, five or six hot wheels cars, a stuffed snoopy and a story book--all the essentials to go to bed--and i can retreat to a little place of quiet.
naptime is mandatory tomorrow.
my two year old missed his nap today. the world is not the same when he misses his nap. let me clarify, MY world is not the same when he misses his nap. short fuse, tears that come quickly, a tantrum here and there, things that he normally enjoys or finds funny put him over the top (with me coming quickly after).
thank goodness--he is now peacefully asleep in his little bed with his blanket, five or six hot wheels cars, a stuffed snoopy and a story book--all the essentials to go to bed--and i can retreat to a little place of quiet.
naptime is mandatory tomorrow.
Monday, September 24, 2007
that inner voice
intuition--it's a very interesting thing that has always perplexed me. that gut feeling that you can't fight. that hunch that you can't explain, but for some reason nine times out of ten, is right. that thing that helps us to act swiftly without thinking. that vibe that you can't fully put into words, but feel with intense emotion and passion. that feeling that this is right, but you can't explain why. this inner drive and thought process that seems almost primal.
this past week, i've experienced intuition in different ways.
i've observed my older son and how he handled an incredibly difficult experience at school. he could have easily cut and run by taking the simple route, but knew that he would need to do 'the right thing'--despite the difficulties he had to work through. carter learned that you need to obey that inner voice even when there are easier choices. as a mom, can't tell you how proud i was (i am!) as a mom, my intuition was to want to make things easier for him--but knowing that this was an experience that will impact how he approaches things to come, let it all happen.
my younger son had a slightly different encounter and learned things the tough way... we were at my parents' home on saturday for a visit and colin was chasing the cat around. when she went down the stairs, he pushed his head through the bannisters so he could watch her go down. he turned his head to an angle--and then his intuition kicked in...PULL OUT! now...when you twist your head to the side, it is impossible to pull one's head back out, yet everything in him was yanking and pulling back. it took me about a minute to help him calm down, to get him to look down and then do what he was trying to do all along--easily pull his head out from between those wooden slots. i know that he is a strong-willed little boy, but was amazed at how he was trying so hard at what he thought was the right thing to do. that instinct was borderline fierce. as a mom, i got to help him learn to remain calm in the heat of it all and to trust... i think he learned some kind of lesson--every time he went by after that, he told me not to put my head in between. (and he didn't follow the cat the rest of the day)
God gives us that inner voice that helps us live life--that voice sometimes protects us, makes us take risks, helps us to do what's right, drives us in new directions, encourages us to stand up for something or someone, preserves us... sometimes it impresses a need that we feel or see around us.
it's an amazing thing that only a profound God could breathe into His creation. i am grateful.
this past week, i've experienced intuition in different ways.
i've observed my older son and how he handled an incredibly difficult experience at school. he could have easily cut and run by taking the simple route, but knew that he would need to do 'the right thing'--despite the difficulties he had to work through. carter learned that you need to obey that inner voice even when there are easier choices. as a mom, can't tell you how proud i was (i am!) as a mom, my intuition was to want to make things easier for him--but knowing that this was an experience that will impact how he approaches things to come, let it all happen.
my younger son had a slightly different encounter and learned things the tough way... we were at my parents' home on saturday for a visit and colin was chasing the cat around. when she went down the stairs, he pushed his head through the bannisters so he could watch her go down. he turned his head to an angle--and then his intuition kicked in...PULL OUT! now...when you twist your head to the side, it is impossible to pull one's head back out, yet everything in him was yanking and pulling back. it took me about a minute to help him calm down, to get him to look down and then do what he was trying to do all along--easily pull his head out from between those wooden slots. i know that he is a strong-willed little boy, but was amazed at how he was trying so hard at what he thought was the right thing to do. that instinct was borderline fierce. as a mom, i got to help him learn to remain calm in the heat of it all and to trust... i think he learned some kind of lesson--every time he went by after that, he told me not to put my head in between. (and he didn't follow the cat the rest of the day)
God gives us that inner voice that helps us live life--that voice sometimes protects us, makes us take risks, helps us to do what's right, drives us in new directions, encourages us to stand up for something or someone, preserves us... sometimes it impresses a need that we feel or see around us.
it's an amazing thing that only a profound God could breathe into His creation. i am grateful.
Friday, September 21, 2007
my other child
i have two boys. they truly are my joy and i couldn't imagine life without their questions and laughter and fighting with each other and loving each other all within the same minute. yet, awhile back, God really pressed something about having a daughter. no--i wasn't pregnant again, we decided to adopt--not in the 'normal' way of adopting a child into your home. we began to sponsor micaelly through a group called Compassion.
we give a monthly donation to this organization. they have sites worldwide that help poverty-stricken children and their families. the fee provides schooling and medical care and meals and the opportunity for us to write back and forth via translators helping us each step of the way. most importantly, the children are given hope--first, because they learn about a God that loves them at all costs and is always there for them and secondly, they know that someone far away cares for them and thinks about them and helps provide for them and loves them. i love that...the downward spiral of poverty is broken by hope.
since we began our sponsorship, we have learned about another culture. we are getting to know a sweet girl and her family--we know some of their hardships, but we are amazed by their gratitude and joy and faith. to help my boys understand about her world, we have gotten books at the library, cooked recipes from their region and have even tried to learn a few key words in her language. (i'm sure i'm slaughtering the pronunciation...we're trying!)
micaelly lives in one of the largest cities in brazil, literally in the urban jungle. her mom works two jobs to provide for her and her two brothers--and i know it's not a luxurious living in any form or
fashion. yet every letter is filled with colorful drawings she's made just for us and words of hope that she is now living out every day. an amazing feeling to know that one can have an impact in someone else's life like that...
all that to say, i have a daughter that lives in brazil. i may never get to meet her in this life, but i know that she has brought me joy as she shares about her faith and what she is learning and getting to do at the project and that we send hugs and kisses back and forth in letters that cross continents.
we give a monthly donation to this organization. they have sites worldwide that help poverty-stricken children and their families. the fee provides schooling and medical care and meals and the opportunity for us to write back and forth via translators helping us each step of the way. most importantly, the children are given hope--first, because they learn about a God that loves them at all costs and is always there for them and secondly, they know that someone far away cares for them and thinks about them and helps provide for them and loves them. i love that...the downward spiral of poverty is broken by hope.
since we began our sponsorship, we have learned about another culture. we are getting to know a sweet girl and her family--we know some of their hardships, but we are amazed by their gratitude and joy and faith. to help my boys understand about her world, we have gotten books at the library, cooked recipes from their region and have even tried to learn a few key words in her language. (i'm sure i'm slaughtering the pronunciation...we're trying!)
micaelly lives in one of the largest cities in brazil, literally in the urban jungle. her mom works two jobs to provide for her and her two brothers--and i know it's not a luxurious living in any form or
fashion. yet every letter is filled with colorful drawings she's made just for us and words of hope that she is now living out every day. an amazing feeling to know that one can have an impact in someone else's life like that...all that to say, i have a daughter that lives in brazil. i may never get to meet her in this life, but i know that she has brought me joy as she shares about her faith and what she is learning and getting to do at the project and that we send hugs and kisses back and forth in letters that cross continents.
friday morning date, the capitol
every friday morning, my two-year old and i have our own special date. we've done this since he was mobile and every friday is a new adventure!
i asked where he wanted to go this friday--he wanted to visit the state capitol.
(what every two-year old wants to do, isn't it?!)
we went and had a blast! (are you allowed to have fun at major government institutions?)
our highlights:
--we jumped off of steps together
--had a lemonade in their restaurant (lunch looked good...but we had stuff to do!)
--rode the elevator to the top
--tried to find our house looking out from the top
(couldn't see our house, but found the zoo and the hospital and fountains and our car)
--laid down on the floor and looked up at the beautiful detailing on the ceilings
--ran around the top floor like it was a giant race track (colin crashed a few times :) )
--went down to the main levels and observed beautiful works of art
(colin was picking out shapes and numbers and i was enjoying the abstract today)
--got a free souvenir from our trip!
the gal who does the tours gave colin a cool poster of the capitol and his reply: coooooool!
i put this on my door in my room!
--we did the steps on the front of the capitol and had a 'rocky' moment
--we walked along the upper walkway to get back to the car, but could only walk on the dark colored squares, not the light ones
--we ran into a few senators on our way back to our car--they were all smiles and said that it was great to see such a young one interested in government :)
all in all, an enjoyable trip that could only be topped off with pb&j and a nap
(wondering if i need to start saving for law school...)
i asked where he wanted to go this friday--he wanted to visit the state capitol.
(what every two-year old wants to do, isn't it?!)
we went and had a blast! (are you allowed to have fun at major government institutions?)
our highlights:
--we jumped off of steps together
--had a lemonade in their restaurant (lunch looked good...but we had stuff to do!)
--rode the elevator to the top
--tried to find our house looking out from the top
(couldn't see our house, but found the zoo and the hospital and fountains and our car)
--laid down on the floor and looked up at the beautiful detailing on the ceilings
--ran around the top floor like it was a giant race track (colin crashed a few times :) )
--went down to the main levels and observed beautiful works of art
(colin was picking out shapes and numbers and i was enjoying the abstract today)
--got a free souvenir from our trip!
the gal who does the tours gave colin a cool poster of the capitol and his reply: coooooool!
i put this on my door in my room!
--we did the steps on the front of the capitol and had a 'rocky' moment
--we walked along the upper walkway to get back to the car, but could only walk on the dark colored squares, not the light ones
--we ran into a few senators on our way back to our car--they were all smiles and said that it was great to see such a young one interested in government :)
all in all, an enjoyable trip that could only be topped off with pb&j and a nap
(wondering if i need to start saving for law school...)
Monday, September 17, 2007
the truly modern woman
in high school and college, i worked at a clothing store at the mall. (yes, that means i was one of those mall chicks) life revolved around knowing what the latest trend is...what was soooooo last week...and what was the new 'it' thing.
got married and a lot of that faded. had a baby and i was just glad to get a shower in, let alone pull together an outfit beyond sweats and a t-shirt that color-coordinated. (oh, how priorities can change) had another baby and was just trying to fit into the clothes i had before, let alone coming up with a style or keeping up with the trends.
the mall chick era seems like ancient history and i'd like to get beyond the sweats thing. so, it's time to stick to the basics now--for me, black has always been key. (and now brown, because brown has been the new black for a bit. i also heard that pink is the new black, but i'm not there yet.)
well...now, that we know black isn't necessarily black in the fashion trends... one also needs to know that you can't just worry about colors or patterns, you truly need to be concerned about what style of shoes you wear. read an online article about how platforms are now out (what am i going to do with all of my chunky shoes???) and it's all about ballet slippers. (to think, all growing up, i was in style and didn't even know it! i was more concerned about getting the flattest shoe around so i wouldn't be the tallest person in my class--which i was until the tenth grade. i dreaded school dances because i was taller than all the guys in my class--i digress...) they mentioned that the truly modern woman is concerned with both comfort and style--which is why the ballet slipper shoe is all the rage.
if that is the criteria for being a truly modern woman, then i'm all about that. (at least the comfort part) and yes...i did buy a pair (black with brown--got the old and new black covered) can't say if i'm feeling truly modern, but i have to say, they are quite comfy.
got married and a lot of that faded. had a baby and i was just glad to get a shower in, let alone pull together an outfit beyond sweats and a t-shirt that color-coordinated. (oh, how priorities can change) had another baby and was just trying to fit into the clothes i had before, let alone coming up with a style or keeping up with the trends.
the mall chick era seems like ancient history and i'd like to get beyond the sweats thing. so, it's time to stick to the basics now--for me, black has always been key. (and now brown, because brown has been the new black for a bit. i also heard that pink is the new black, but i'm not there yet.)
well...now, that we know black isn't necessarily black in the fashion trends... one also needs to know that you can't just worry about colors or patterns, you truly need to be concerned about what style of shoes you wear. read an online article about how platforms are now out (what am i going to do with all of my chunky shoes???) and it's all about ballet slippers. (to think, all growing up, i was in style and didn't even know it! i was more concerned about getting the flattest shoe around so i wouldn't be the tallest person in my class--which i was until the tenth grade. i dreaded school dances because i was taller than all the guys in my class--i digress...) they mentioned that the truly modern woman is concerned with both comfort and style--which is why the ballet slipper shoe is all the rage.
if that is the criteria for being a truly modern woman, then i'm all about that. (at least the comfort part) and yes...i did buy a pair (black with brown--got the old and new black covered) can't say if i'm feeling truly modern, but i have to say, they are quite comfy.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
it's a 'good thing'
i once had a friend tell me that i was too much like martha stewart. she clarified that everything always looks good on the outside. i'm always pulled together. (i disagreed whole-heartedly with her...i often feel like i'm one giant loose end) that conversation stuck with me...obviously.
been thinking a lot lately about how i've come to God like martha...trying to have everything pulled together. like i've said in a previous post, it's been a tough year. how many times have i come to God saying all the right things, but feeling broken in pieces inside?
much of my world is in the christian community, where honestly, it seems as though we are supposed to have it all pulled together all the time. if you don't, you're not the christian you are supposed to be--Jesus is supposed to have fixed everything in our lives. if you're a mess, you must not be following God or studying the Bible enough or praying enough. over the past year, i've gotten over a lot of that...thinking that i'm supposed to have it pulled together because Jesus is in my life, of living a christian 'image'--free of flaws and doubts.
on the contrary, i'm learning more and more that the brokenness is where growth and wholeness with God are. the more i've cried out to Him in my brokenness and hurt, the more i feel like He's doing a work in me. i'm broken, but He is the one who is pulling things together...making things better. i can cry to Him, i can yell my honest feelings to Him, i can surrender my life to Him.
i'm learning that if i try to pull things together on my own, i will fall a million miles short. when i let God take my broken pieces, He can do miracles and do amazing and good things.
been thinking a lot lately about how i've come to God like martha...trying to have everything pulled together. like i've said in a previous post, it's been a tough year. how many times have i come to God saying all the right things, but feeling broken in pieces inside?
much of my world is in the christian community, where honestly, it seems as though we are supposed to have it all pulled together all the time. if you don't, you're not the christian you are supposed to be--Jesus is supposed to have fixed everything in our lives. if you're a mess, you must not be following God or studying the Bible enough or praying enough. over the past year, i've gotten over a lot of that...thinking that i'm supposed to have it pulled together because Jesus is in my life, of living a christian 'image'--free of flaws and doubts.
on the contrary, i'm learning more and more that the brokenness is where growth and wholeness with God are. the more i've cried out to Him in my brokenness and hurt, the more i feel like He's doing a work in me. i'm broken, but He is the one who is pulling things together...making things better. i can cry to Him, i can yell my honest feelings to Him, i can surrender my life to Him.
i'm learning that if i try to pull things together on my own, i will fall a million miles short. when i let God take my broken pieces, He can do miracles and do amazing and good things.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
are kids kids anymore?
i love my boys. they are where most of my time and energy are focused. my husband and i do our best to help them find their strengths, work through their weaknesses and provide them opportunities for them to learn and grow and discover who God made them to be.
this evening, i was at our school's 'curriculum night'--a great opportunity to hear first-hand what the expectations are for our kids as students and how as parents we need to do our part to aid in their education.
i want to clarify first that i love school--it is where a foundation is laid for a child to turn into a life-long learner. (a trait i admire greatly and encourage) i believe whole-heartedly that it is not the school's (or church's or government's) responsibility to train and raise my child. they assist parents in the training...but ultimately, moms and dads are responsible to grow their kids up to be grounded, confident, independent, responsible adults.
all that to say, i walked away from the evening overwhelmed by all the standards and requirements that my child has to successfully complete for his grade level. beyond 'normal' homework, we have reading logs and math logs, weekly readers and spelling pre- and post- tests. as parents, we should be doing math facts as we drive them to school, spelling words on the way home, independent reading for a slot of time and then math sheets to help them improve for another time slot of the evening. we should encourage reading before bed and maybe visiting one of the recommended educational game websites regularly each week (maybe a couple times each week). make sure they get enough sleep and a good breakfast because this grade level has an exceptionally late lunch time and we need to do our part to send our kids to school ready to focus and learn.
(we haven't even added chess club and piano lessons and church activities and basketball practices...)
all of it left me wondering, are kids kids anymore? do they know how to play? i mean really play--not us telling them that they need to practice left-handed layups at the hoop, but having nothing more than an open backyard and some sticks and let their imagination go. I remember playing with the neighbor kids in our grassy backyard, sometimes imitating a favorite tv show, but mostly making up our own characters in an imaginary world where a patch of tall grassy weeds was an intimidating forest and the neighbor cat was a vicious lion. i remember having our own 'shows' on someone's back patio and creating our own tickets and mixing up kool-aid to serve as refreshments to our patrons.
it makes me sad that my boys don't play that way. you can't pretend cook with leftover tupperware dishes in the sandbox. you have to head to target to get a special plastic stove and miniture dishes and have an electric outlet nearby (or a small aresenal of batteries) to turn on all the lights and simulated heating element.
i want my boys to learn all that they are to in school and more, but i want them to be abl
e to have time in the afternoon to chase a butterfly or study the anthill or watch the clouds go by. i want them to pretend and imagine and dream.
e to have time in the afternoon to chase a butterfly or study the anthill or watch the clouds go by. i want them to pretend and imagine and dream.guess it will come once we get through reading and spelling and math and...
britney should not be a national headline
okay...woke up yesterday morning. was having my bowl of cereal (kellogg's smart start--us blondes gotta do what we need to) and decided to turn on cbs's morning show, hoping to catch the basics on what's been going on in the world. the second story they focused on (and spent about five minutes focused on) was on britney spears' performance on mtv's video music awards.
this was the only thing happening this weekend? in all the world, with all that happens, we have to focus five minutes on the fact that she was wearing sparkly underwear--radiant after having two children, criticizing that her lip-sync was less than stellar?! 'her head wasn't obviously fully in the game' they observed. wait...lip-sync...at a music awards show...where you are singing in front of your collegues, to your fans that pay millions of dollars because they want to hear you sing?! the commentators bantered back and forth about if they thought she was 'back' or not and then were on to the latest headlines in iraq.
maybe i should change jobs and lip sync for a living. could pay a few bills...who knows, it could even make national headlines now. but believe me, you wouldn't want to see me in britney's outfit :)
this was the only thing happening this weekend? in all the world, with all that happens, we have to focus five minutes on the fact that she was wearing sparkly underwear--radiant after having two children, criticizing that her lip-sync was less than stellar?! 'her head wasn't obviously fully in the game' they observed. wait...lip-sync...at a music awards show...where you are singing in front of your collegues, to your fans that pay millions of dollars because they want to hear you sing?! the commentators bantered back and forth about if they thought she was 'back' or not and then were on to the latest headlines in iraq.
maybe i should change jobs and lip sync for a living. could pay a few bills...who knows, it could even make national headlines now. but believe me, you wouldn't want to see me in britney's outfit :)
Monday, September 10, 2007
beautiful
yesterday, i was at my parents' home for a quick visit. colin, my two-year old, was looking at all the pictures placed around the house. he came across a picture of me on my wedding day and his response brings me to tears. 'that's mom...she's beautiful' no prompting or coaching or fishing. just sweet and loving. oh...that i would speak my heart like that each day.
appreciating the complexly simple
life has been stressful the past year or so. in the middle of all the craziness, God has been impressing some things in my life. it has not been about all the difficulties or challenges or trials. God has been reminding me how beautiful He made the world, how He made it for us to enjoy, how He speaks everyday with shouts--we just miss them so often because we aren't looking for them.
this past summer, my family took a trip to the yellowstone area. mountains always scream of God's power and wonder to me, yet so many of the moments I saw of God's power this trip were in small things. flowers blooming through a snowbank in july. rocks placed in just the right place so we can step out into a cool mountain lake. the smooth blue surface of a vast lake. intricate details in a huge picture.
we saw amazing sights, yet the most beautiful moments were the simple ones. those beautiful moments on a vacation reminded me how those beautiful moments are all around...i so often overlook them because i'm pulled back, looking at and worrrying about a bigger picture.
i'm learning how God has beauty surrounding each one of us and He wants us to enjoy and savor it all. it may not be mountain vistas or sparkling waterfalls. it may be wide open spaces, watching bees and butterflies around a flower blossom, following shadows as the sun sets.
i'm learning to keep my eyes open, looking for God at work in the simple.
this past summer, my family took a trip to the yellowstone area. mountains always scream of God's power and wonder to me, yet so many of the moments I saw of God's power this trip were in small things. flowers blooming through a snowbank in july. rocks placed in just the right place so we can step out into a cool mountain lake. the smooth blue surface of a vast lake. intricate details in a huge picture.
we saw amazing sights, yet the most beautiful moments were the simple ones. those beautiful moments on a vacation reminded me how those beautiful moments are all around...i so often overlook them because i'm pulled back, looking at and worrrying about a bigger picture.
i'm learning how God has beauty surrounding each one of us and He wants us to enjoy and savor it all. it may not be mountain vistas or sparkling waterfalls. it may be wide open spaces, watching bees and butterflies around a flower blossom, following shadows as the sun sets.
i'm learning to keep my eyes open, looking for God at work in the simple.
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