expectations

we expect many things in life and many expect things of us.  some things exceed our expectations and others leave us disappointed.  we may surprise others as we surpass their expectations or we may leave them flat on their face as we don't live up to what they had wanted from or out of us.

i've pondered that a lot lately.  i've corresponded with some friends of days long ago recently and i remember all the promise and anticipation we shared together.  we were going to do big things in the world--changing it in incredible ways.  have we done it?  is the world different now because we've been out living in it?  

i know that my perspective is different now than it was years ago.  back then, before i let God into my life, i thought i would have the impact...that i would do something that would make a difference, that i could do something that could help make the world a better place.  now i know that i can do a little, but if i choose to let God use me...well, that's a whole different story!  i don't understand fully how He wants to use me, i just know that i need to be available and expect God to move.  my expectations have shifted from myself to God.  i know that He will always, always exceed any expectation i may have.

i'm not the same person i was then.  some of my dreams are the same, some have faded as my perpective and expectations have grown and changed.  new thoughts and desires and dreams are growing.  i know that i am small in the world's eyes, but i know that God loves me in the deepest way and has expectations for me as i go living life for Him.  we can change the world--it just may be different than we expected.